Lori, this is so out of my depth. I know how hard it was before you had Megan, and applaude your bravery in facing that again. Just know you have our love and support.

A very good friend of Matt's lost their baby at about 8 months. I have never seen grief like it.
BCS

Lori, coming from someone who had decided their family was complete after my 2nd child, and go so far as having a tubal ligation AND then ending up pregnant only for it to turn out as an ectopic pregnancy, I can relate with how unfair and frustrating conception and pregnancy can be. After the initial shock last year of getting countless positive pregnancy tests and a missing period, only to be told by the lab techs and doctors to not even think of it as a baby was just devastating mentally. I did countless research on people who conceived after getting your tubes tied and even though this was something I never thought was on the radar I fell head over heels for something medical professionals didn't even consider a baby. I instantly went from we are a complete family of four to planning for baby #3, believing it was truly a miracle. Thinking about how truly lucky I am to have Zoe & Brody and an amazing husband did help my healing, but none the less, it hurt. Yes, you are truly lucky to have Megan and Jack, but I know that does not take away the ache to share your love and happy home with another child. Reading Dear Elena definitely sheds perspective on life, I can not imagine the grief they are feeling, but again, it does not take away your desire for another child.

Don't lose hope. A friend of mine is currently in the last few weeks of her pregnancy and it was a long & tough road to get there. She had an ectopic pregnancy and her & her husband had scheduled an appointment with a fertility specialist to discuss their options for IVF, when she found out she was pregnant the day before their appointment. It has been a tough pregnancy as well as she has other health issues, but baby is healthy and growing right on track. Anyway, sorry this got so long. Just hang in there. I wish you guys all the luck in the world to have another healthy, happy baby.

Loving Jack and Megan doesn't mean there isn't room and longing for more love. I'm thinking of you and hurting with you and pulling for you.

I love all my comment-ors but I think your missing my point. I can long for and hope for another child, but right now I need to live in the moment and enjoy the the wonderful life I already have. Spending every waking moment dreaming of the future only means I'm not in the moment now enjoying watching Dora with Megan. My point with my post was to stop feeling sorry for myself... because I have it good. Life is too precious to waste feeling sorry for oneself.